I've been very frustrated at work lately and getting very fed up. I do a job that I don't particularly like (I work in IT) and find very soulless, and it's quite thankless and relentless at times. Sometimes I get really ground down and wish I didn't have to get up and go into work for more of the same crap.
This week, I got my wish. What with DP having leg troubles and having to ferry him to and from hospital and help him out at home while he wasn't very mobile, and now having been exposed to swine flu (SD's case is now confirmed) I've been home since last Friday. But today, I woke up and realised that I actually missed the structure of work, after a few days thinking "hey I could get used to this!"
I have often wondered how people like the BM can justify not working, when they are perfectly able bodied and healthy. And what on earth they do all day. I know she's a mum, and I've nothing against mums who want to stay home for the kids particularly when they're young, but she's on benefits, her living paid for by people like me who do work, and she doesn't get much money so what she can provide for SD is limited, and I also wonder about the kind of example it shows her. I was raised to take pride in what you do, whether it's toilet cleaning, clowning or being Prime Minister, and I just don't think I could, in all good conscience, not earn my own living, unless of course I was too ill to do so.
It was a surprise to me that I begun to miss work, especially after all the complaining I do about my job. However, it's also perhaps a wake up call for me that it's not working per se that's my problem, it's the kind of work I do. I do fantasise about having a job that I enjoy, and that contributes a bit more to society than fixing computers for ungrateful moaning office workers, but to date I haven't done much about doing anything to change myself from bored IT support worker to something I would have passion for. So I think that might be my next challenge, to find out how over the next 12 months I could make some steps to change my future so that I don't have to dread getting out of bed in the morning. Or heaven forbid, follow in BM's footsteps and have a kid so I don't have to....